Call Out My Name
by Shahbano Aliani 

i knew who i was 

where i was

when i was with You

then you took away all

but a flicker of this knowing

blind folded 

and left me out

all alone 

in a long, dark night

lost and unconscious

trapped in my self

the knowing that was i 

buried deep, 

deep somewhere

covered 

in layer upon layer of darkness

this flicker 

blazed sometimes

when i saw 

the face of one i loved

with a love that choked thought

made me forget 

everything  

this flicker 

flared up sometimes

when i stood enchanted 

by the quietest of lakes

in the heart of a red-earth mountain

filled with awe

that felt like unspeakable terror

made me tremble 

made me shake

this flicker 

became a torch, a light

when a verse of poetry 

a verse of prayer

squeezed and wrenched 

and tore my heart

made me yearn for something 

i could not name 

the night is still dark 

the flicker a flame

dancing ahead 

playing hide and seek

with each step that i walk 

towards this light

the path behind 

closes forever

even if i wanted 

there is no way back

and ahead 

the night is my path 

stretched out 

forever

speak to me 

give me a sign:

call out my name 

please! 

call out my name!

By Shahbano Aliani, in A Kaleidoscope of Stories: Muslim Voices in Contemporary Poetry (Lote Tree Press, 2020)  www.lotetreepress.com